Month: August 2022

CITADEL (2012) Months after his wife was fatally attacked by a group of mysterious children, Tommy (Aneurin Barnard) realizes the same kids have come back to terrorize him and his daughter. While his mental health deteriorates, Tommy receives help from a disgraced priest (James Cosmo) who informs him the children are inhuman creatures that feed off fear. As with director Ciarán Foy’s other films (Eli, Sinister 2), Citadel is a good concept not fully realized. Yet, for most of the short 84-minute runtime the film works quite well, with Foy building a genuinely suspenseful and claustrophobic environment for Tommy to grapple with – not to mention some creepy, Cronenberg-esque kids. A lackluster conclusion slightly stains the overall impact the rest of the movie has, with one wondering what a few more rewrites of the screenplay might have achieved. B–

PHANTOMS (1998) A small Colorado town is overtaken by a mysterious, shapeshifting black ooze (not unlike The X-Files) emanating from below the ground in this entertaining but slight adaptation of the popular Dean Koontz book. When the town’s new doctor (Joanna Going) and her sister (Rose McGowan) arrive to discover most of the inhabitants dead or missing, they, along with the sheriff (Ben Affleck), try to figure out how to escape alive, and possibly save the rest of humanity. A good first half that builds intriguing mystery is muted with the introduction of too many uninteresting characters and a lengthy sequence inside a military vehicle where said characters sit around and hypothesize the creature’s origins. The special FX are good and the action robust, just don’t expect too much meat on these bones. C+

THE POSSESSION OF JOEL DELANEY (1972) Wealthy New York socialite Norah (Shirley MacLaine) becomes suspicious of brother, Joel’s (Perry King), change in behavior when he starts acting aggressive and speaking in a language he doesn’t know. When Joel’s girlfriend is found murdered, Norah believes the spirit of Joel’s deceased Puerto Rican friend (and serial killer) has invaded her brother’s body. An intriguing and suspenseful film that plays out more like a mystery than your typical possession movie, although it has its share of shocking moments. MacLaine is excellent and the mood bleak. The screenplay falls apart during the last several, hectic minutes, but the downbeat ending rings true. B

STRANGE INVADERS (1983) A love letter to ’50s sci-fi flicks, this has college professor, Dr. Bigelow (Paul LeMat), looking for his ex-wife (Diana Scarwid) in a small town and inadvertently stumbling onto a secret alien takeover that’s been going on for 25 years. With the help of a tabloid newspaper writer (Nancy Allen), Bigelow tries to uncover the alien plot, only to end up getting his daughter kidnapped and the government involved. Sort of a companion piece to director Michael Laughlin’s Strange Behavior, Invaders is both odd and charming, utilizing its kitschy premise by playing up the nostalgic vibe of movies like Invaders from Mars and Invasion of the Body Snatchers, and downplaying the seriousness of those films at the same time. Allen and Fiona Lewis (in a small role) are both delightful, but LeMat is wooden and unsympathetic. It’s not perfect, but there’s a lot to like here, and given the small budget, the practical FX are terrific. B

THE COLLINGSWOOD STORY (2002) The first of the webcam horror films that emerged in the wake of The Blair Witch Project, this simplistic film has a college student (Stephanie Dees) moving away from home and using webcams to communicate with her boyfriend (Johnny Burton). Unbeknownst to them, her new house was once the site of a mass murder associated with a satanic cult, bringing upon her a series of supernatural occurrences. It’s obvious the subgenre hadn’t yet found its footing, as this is much talkier and humorless than similar movies of its kind. The film has a genuinely unsettling atmosphere, but its slow pace and heavy reliance on exposition to build suspense hurts the impact the story could have had with a tighter, more focused screenplay. C+   

THE DEADLY SPAWN (1983) An enjoyable, low, low budget romp in the tradition of The Evil Dead, this pits a houseful of people against a multi-headed alien beastie with sharp teeth and a large appetite for human flesh. When the house’s monster-loving kid (Charles George Hilderbandt) becomes wise to the creature’s heightened sense of hearing, he uses it to his advantage to try and save his family from becoming next on the alien’s dinner plate. A fast pace and genuine excitement help lift this above its obvious budgetary restraints and somewhat dull characters. The OTT gore FX also add some spice to the paper-thin story, all leading up to a wonderful twist ending that would give Little Shop of Horrors a run for its money. B

SHE WILL (2022) Yet another “intellectual” non-horror “horror” movie that seems to have been made just for the pretentious film festival circuit. After aging movie star, Veronica Ghent (Alice Krige), undergoes a double mastectomy, she travels to a woodsy retreat to convalesce, only to find out the place was once the site of mass witch burnings. When Veronica begins seeing visions of said witches, she undergoes a physical and mental transformation, and uses her newfound powers to enact revenge against her male oppressors. Both obvious in its metaphors and mundane in its execution, She Will is a dumb movie that thinks it’s smart; the script never allows its characters to feel authentic or, most importantly, sympathetic. We’re automatically expected to side with Ghent because of a hinted past traumatic event that turned her into the chilly character presented in the film, but the movie itself is too cold and disjointed to allow the audience to make up its own mind. If you’re the type who likes to watch stock footage of snails having sex, this is the movie for you. D