KILLER’S DELIGHT (1978) A killer is picking up hitchhikers and disposing of their naked bodies off-road in and around San Francisco. The point of origin of the victims is a public pool, where a pretty friend of the cop (James Luisi) assigned to the case is murdered, turning Luisi into a regular Dirty Harry on a mission to find the culprit and blow the scumbag away. And scumbag he is—the killer (John Karlen) gets sexual satisfaction from breaking fingers and snapping arms until the victim passes out. Karlen is eventually outsmarted by Luisi’s psychologist girlfriend (Susan Sullivan), who sets the killer up in a sting operation, but not before Karlen figures out her plot. The outcome is what you’d expect from this well-acted, competently made, but not entirely interesting psychodrama.
THE NEWLYDEADS (1988) A country inn for newlyweds becomes the killing ground for a cross-dressing ghost (Scott Kaske) who’s seeking revenge for his murder at the hands of the philandering owner (Jim Williams). One of the guests, a psychic (Jean Levine), warns the others of impending doom but nobody believes her until it’s too late. Kaske ruins a couple’s night of ecstasy by running a pipe through the man’s (Doug Jones) skull and finishing the woman off with a butcher’s knife. Williams tries to dispose of the bodies without causing a panic, an act that seals his fate when Kaske manipulates Williams into stabbing his new bride to death in the shower. More people end up massacred—a maid’s head is lopped off with a tree saw—but no amount of bloodshed can save The Newlydeads from being dead on arrival. Even the rare moments of humor don’t help overcome the very poor production quality or a story that resembles nothing within the context of structured writing. Stupendously idiotic; likely to offend some, and bore others.
SHOCKING DARK (1989) Mass pollution has turned Venice into an uninhabitable wasteland and ground zero for a scientific research project. The Marines are called into action when the facility’s underground tunnel systems become infested with subterranean creatures, which turns this howler into nothing more than a blatant rip-off of Aliens. A Sigourney Weaver-type (Haven Taylor) is brought in to lead the Marines through the maze-like tunnels, with the gang naturally falling victim to a plethora of monster mayhem. Taylor and a child scavenger are intentionally locked in a room with one of the creatures by a robotic humanoid (Christopher Ahrens) working for the corporation responsible for polluting the city in the first place. Doing his worst Schwarzenegger impersonation, Ahrens turns into a cyborg killing machine hellbent on eliminating Taylor before she discovers the corporation’s secret time travel device, at which point Shocking Dark turns into a low rent Terminator clone—the film was actually retitled Terminator II in Europe! In fact, the only thing Shocking Dark has going for it is its brazen plagiarism that should be seen to be believed. Not nearly as much fun as Bruno Mattei’s cheesy cannibal epic, Hell of the Living Dead (1980). Stick with zombies, Bruno.
